According to this myth, everyone’s pinky finger is tied to an invisible red string that will lead him or her to another person with whom they will make history. For the East Asian belief originating from Chinese legend. Human relations that the gods tie to the pinky fingers of those who find each other in life. Legend has it that the two people connected by this thread will have an important story, regardless of the time, place or circumstances. The red string might be tangled or stretched, as surely often happens, but it can never break. This legend explains life’s mysteries in a way that is both believable and incredibly romantic. If Fate really exists, let us hope that it works in exactly the way that’s described here. Being a viewpoint on life and relationships it has given birth to holistic philosophy, which states that our vital essence isn’t confined to the borders of our physical body. Holists declare that we are one with the Universe and see the notion of the Red String as one of the ways towards understanding this unity.
But love isn’t as simple as simple as the red thread of fate sounds isn’t it? Remember this thread is invisible, and it’s up to us to look and choose the correct lover in this crazy ride we call life. Many of us confuse the real meaning behind love and all the requirements it brings along the way or maybe we just have the wrong idea of love. In our culture there is a mythology that love just happens. As a result, the depressed often sit around passively waiting for someone to love them. But love doesn’t work that way. To get love and keep love you have to go out and be active and learn every step. Most of us get our ideas of love from popular culture. We come to believe that love is something that sweeps us off our feet. But the pop-culture ideal of love consists of unrealistic images created for entertainment, which is one reason so many of us are set up to be depressed.
While researching a little about love and love in different cultures I read about Limerance. It’s important we recognize the difference between limerance and love. Limerance is the psychological state of deep infatuation. It feels good but rarely lasts. Limerance is that first stage of mad attraction whereby all the hormones are flowing and things feel so right. Limerance lasts, on average, six months. It can progress to love. Love mostly starts out as limerance, but limerance doesn’t always evolve into love. One consequence is that when we hit real love we become upset and disappointed because there are many things that do not fit the cultural ideal. Some of us get demanding and controlling, wanting someone else to do what we think our ideal of romance should be, without realizing our ideal is misplaced.
On my journey to love i’ve personally learned good communication skills. They are a means by which you develop trust and intensify connection. The more you can communicate the less depressed you will be because you will feel known and understood. I personally advise everyone to communicate with their loved ones and i am not only talking about a lover I am also talking about your friends and family. I once was that person that had problems opening up and expressing feelings to to others. Now that i look back it feels extraordinary to be able to communicate with the world. Try it! We should keep a balance with love for every single person that surrounds us, even strangers. There is always enough love for everyone and everything. Just as the divine love from above.
For me, Love is as critical for your mind and body as oxygen. What i really think is that the red thread can and will always be there but if you can’t love and accept yourself you will never be able to find or be able to love your soulmate in life. I think when falling into love we need to focus on the other person. Rather than focus on what you are getting and how you are being treated, read your partner’s need. What does this person really need for his/her own well-being? This is a very tough skill for people to learn in our narcissistic culture. Of course, you don’t lose yourself in the process; you make sure you’re also doing enough self-care, because like i said if you don’t find and have self love it will be truly hard to pour out love to others.
Photography: Inspiro Studio (Jonian Palencia & Alex Sambula)
MUA: Gabriela Pineda
Models: Sobeyda Padilla & Jose Chinchilla
Fashion Director: Tiffany Acosta
Written and directed by Tiffany Acosta